Monday, April 19, 2010

Chapter One

So, I haven't posted a story in a while now as I've started working on a new project. Here is a tentative, rough draft of the first chapter from what will hopefully become a full book. Sorry for the weird format, for whatever reason Blogspot doesn't allow indents, even when I tried manually spacing each one. Oh well. So, here it is:

CHAPTER ONE

The wagon trundled down the pitted road, bouncing at every hole and rock in the dirt. A group of soldiers marched alongside it, oblivious to the rhythmic pounding of horse hooves hitting the packed earth. Each was armored with thick leather plates and chain mail, which provided ample support while allowing for freedom of movement. The helmets completed their armor, the painted skull on top giving off a fearsome visage. The squad of soldiers seemed ready for almost anything that came their way.

Unfortunately for them, they weren’t.

Rain sat in the back of the wagon, chin in hand. Every time the wagon bounced, so did she, but it did not matter. She was focused on the task at hand: getting inside the prison and finding her goal. At this point, nothing could faze her. She looked around at the five other prisoners in the wagon with her. Most of them wore defeated expressions on their faces. It seemed that they too were beyond the point of caring, if not for the same reasons as she.

“Are you sure you want to do this?” the prisoner sitting across from her spoke up. “We can still get out of this without risking our necks.”

Rain looked at him. “Leon, you know we can’t do that.”

“I didn’t think so,” he sighed. “Just thought I’d ask.”

Rain lowered her gaze and allowed herself a small smile. Leon Rush had been her closest friend for many years. He had faithfully followed her on whatever ridiculous ventures she set out on. And while he usually put his own survival first, he had never let her down before.

Leon hooked a finger over the smooth metal collar that hung around his neck. “Did we really need to allow them to capture us and put these things on our necks?”

“Yes, Leon,” she sighed. “What better way to get into a prison than to become a prisoner?”

“But you aren’t affected by the collars,” Leon pointed out. He grimaced. “You don’t know what it’s like to be cut off from your gift.”

Rain looked away for a moment. “I know that, Leon. I’m sorry for bringing you into this.”

“You know I would not have abandoned you,” Leon said. “Especially where we’re headed.”

Rain looked forward through a slit in the front of the wagon. Her view was mostly obscured by the soldier, but she could make out the prison just ahead. It was an ugly complex, partially hewn out of the surrounding mountains and fortified with stone walls. Decades ago, a moat had been dug around the front half of the prison; the mountain provided plenty of protection in the back. Rain watched as the heavy drawbridge began lowering.

“It looks like we’re here,” she said. “Are you ready, Leon?”

“As ready as I will ever be,” he replied. “Just don’t get killed once we get in there.”

“I will exercise the utmost caution,” she said, the hint of a smile coming to her lips. Outside, she could hear the bridge closing the rest of the way. A guard called out to the soldiers as the wagon continued forward.

“You know what to do, Leon,” she said. “This will only take a minute.”

The wagon rolled onto the bridge, jostling the prisoners. Rain looked around one last time at the defeated, uncaring faces. They did not understand what their crime was, but had resigned themselves to fate. With a little luck, Rain could set them, and the other convicts in the prison, free.

The wagon stopped. Rain heard the chains of the drawbridge squealing as the guards brought it back up into place. She closed her eyes, listening for footsteps and voices. Including the driver and the group that had accompanied the prisoner transport, she thought she heard a good dozen soldiers, maybe more. They were fair odds.

She locked eyes with Leon again. Silently, she brought her hands up and pressed on either side of the seamless collar. It popped open without a sound. She leaned her neck to the left, feeling relief at the cracking sound. The other prisoners made no sign of moving as she stepped toward the end of the wagon.

A hand appeared and threw open the canvas covering. Rain exploded from the wagon, grabbing the guard by the base of the neck. She used her momentum to flip herself over him, twisting as she did so. She was rewarded with a sickening crunch as the man’s neck snapped. Letting go, she grabbed the sword sitting in its sheath on his back, drawing it out in one smooth motion.

She landed on her feet, the guard’s corpse already falling behind her.

The other guards leaped to attention, drawing swords as she turned to the nearest one. She had to give them credit; they were faster on their feet than she had anticipated. The guard nearest her was already charging at her. She lashed out with her foot, impacting his kneecap. As he staggered she jabbed upward with her palm, breaking his jaw.

Out of the corner of her eye, she saw two more guards rushing forward. Three others were pointing their crossbows at her. Reaching out, she grabbed the guard with the broken jaw and pulled him between her and the guards with the crossbows. Three thumps followed as the bolts slammed into the guard’s abdomen. She pushed the body forward, catching the two nearest soldiers by surprise. They reeled back, pushing the body away, as she leapt forward, deftly slicing both their throats open with a flick of her wrist.

Looking around, she assessed the room. The three guards with crossbows stood near one wall, hurriedly reloading. There were two guards still standing on either side of wagon. The driver was dismounting from his seat in the front of the wagon, joining his companions as they prepared to attack. The two guards operating the drawbridge were turning to her as well.

Five with swords, three with crossbows, she thought. That’s good enough odds for me.

She stepped toward the wagon, putting it between her and the soldiers with the crossbows, drawing nearer to the guards next to the wagon. The first one swung at her neck; she brought up her sword and deflected his blade upward. In one fluid motion, she ran him through the stomach and pushed forward, toppling him backward toward the two others behind him. Placing her hands on the falling guard’s shoulders, she vaulted into the air and twisted. She struck both guards in the temple, one with her fist and one with her foot, and landed on her feet behind them. As they stumbled, she swept her leg around in a circle, knocking them onto the ground. She retrieved her sword and slashed it across both their throats. Hot blood spilled out onto the ground.

Three down. The other soldiers would be on guard now; they knew it was foolish to attack her one at a time. The horses that had pulled the wagon in were panicking now, adding to the growing confusion in the chamber. Carefully, Rain crouched low, looking out from beneath the wagon. She saw the two guards near the drawbridge, slowly approaching the wagon. She glanced at the soldiers wielding the crossbows and paused. Where there shoot have been three pairs of feet, there were only two.

They sent the other one to raise the alarm, she thought, grimacing. I’ve wasted too much time. Time to end this.

She stood up and curled her left hand into a fist. Concentrating, she felt the power coursing through her. It burned through her, a mixture of euphoria and pain. Pure white, crackling energy manifested around her fist, waiting to be unleashed.

“All right boys, let’s play,” she said. Energy swirling around her fist, Rain leapt out from behind the back of the wagon, sweeping her hand toward the two guards holding the crossbows. They were already raising their weapons as bolts of energy slammed into them, burning a gaping hole through each of their chests. The two remaining guards turned, trying to escape through the passages leading farther into the prison. Two more bolts of power struck them, sending them spinning into the rock wall.

The fight finished, Rain drew the power back into herself, watching as the light faded from her fist. The burning sensation that filled her body receded as well. She stepped toward the wagon and threw open the canvas covering. The other four prisoners looked out at her with a mixture of awe and fear; Leon simply smiled at her.

“Well, let’s not just sit around all day,” he said, urging the others to get up. “You’re free. I suggest you escape this place while you still have the chance.”

“But, what do we do about the collars?” asked one of the prisoners, a frail-looking woman.

“Not to worry,” Rain said. She reached upward and placed her hands on two points on the collar. A seam appeared on the metal band, and it popped open. The woman felt her neck, tears forming in her eyes.

“Thank you,” she murmured as Rain helped her out of the wagon. Rain wordlessly nodded her acknowledgement as she helped the others out of the wagon, releasing them from the collars as she went. One man snapped his fingers, causing a tiny flame to appear. A smile stole across the weary face. After everyone was freed, Rain directed them toward the small door that stood to one side of the drawbridge.

“Why thank you, ma’am,” Leon said, chuckling as he jumped down from the wagon.

“Maybe I should leave yours on,” Rain threatened.

Leon put one hand on the collar in mock horror. “You know you wouldn’t do that. Now, if you don’t mind, could you remove this thing from my neck? It’s starting to itch a little.”

With a sigh, Rain depressed the points on the collar, and it clicked open. She held the collars in her hand, which now hung limp as they were no longer in use. She stuffed them into the pouch on her belt; she always liked to keep a few handy, just in case an enemy used magic as well.

She closed the pouch and walked to the front of the wagon. Now that the room was quiet again, the horses had calmed a little, and Rain worked to ease their fears before going back to the driver’s seat. There, wrapped in a cloth, were the weapons they had taken from her when she and Leon had been captured. She pulled black the cloth and revealed the twin short swords lying beneath. Both were over two feet long, double-edged, and razor-sharp. Each blade was two inches across, with a slight inward curve in the center. The hilts were made of carved bone. All in all, they were fearsome weapons in the right hands.

Rain picked them up, one in each hand. With a little flourish, she slid them back into the two scabbards that crossed her back, so that one hilt showed over each shoulder. She looked up and saw Leon smirking at her.

“What?” she demanded.

“It’s nothing,” Leon answered. “You don’t see very many women carrying swords around is all.”

“Well, I’m not most women,” she replied. “Now let’s get going. Those prisoners are not going to rescue themselves.”

“Not to mention that the whole place is probably on alert by now,” Leon added.

“So there’s no time to spare,” she finished, already heading for one of the side passages, hoping that it led to the cells. Leon followed behind her, hurriedly buckling a scabbard he had taken from one of the guards around his waist.

Rain grinned; it was time to have some fun.

3 comments:

  1. Not bad, though you may want to consider a short prologue to describe the universe it takes place in. Some emphasis on the peculiarities of your idea of magic would prolbably help too.

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  2. it was good past the first paragraph i think the in depth explanation of the soldiers was a little much it didnt catch my attention as an average reader...solid idea with rebels and magic, its always a good mix...the way it was left, however, seems as tho her "goal" was just to release prisoners....dont know where your going with it but maybe have her searching for a father or someone like that and have her only find that he/she isnt in said prison...theres quite a few different directions that this could go in...bring it to me and ill bounce some ideas of my own at you

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  3. @Joe, Yeah, I thought about giving a descriptor type thing with it, so I might write that up. Thanks for the suggestion.

    @Spence, Well, her "goal" here really is to release prisoners, and actually her sister is in the prison, so that's also important. Like I said, I might post some sort of synopsis of this initial beginning I suppose. But also the way I like to write is begin with something a little bit short and have an air of mystery and then develop on that in the chapters afterword, so that people aren't bored with details from the start. As to the explanation of the soldiers, that's why I really only one paragraph. But thanks for the comment.

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